hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
