Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
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I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
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I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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