My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize