Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize