A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
