I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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