can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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