he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
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