Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
