And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
