So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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