so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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