He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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