belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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