.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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