mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
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