Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
