so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
actually, I'm a sock model
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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