So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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