i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
