What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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