I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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