he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Randomize
