what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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