I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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