that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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