I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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