seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
