I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
You are the jesus of drinking
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
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