Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
