Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(514): View more from Quebec

I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.

(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

They always sound like a bunch of chickens.

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(212): View more from New York

where am i from again

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(773): View more from Illinois

There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.

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27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(202): View more from Washington, DC

Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.

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(480): View more from Arizona

I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.

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(252): View more from North Carolina

it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet

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(870): View more from Arkansas

Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.

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(928): View more from Arizona

Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.

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