What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize