found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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