are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Randomize