There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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