I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
