i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
