i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
