she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
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