jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
