awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
