we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I have already put on my inside pants.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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