my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize