The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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