I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
