If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
After last night, I could never be a politician.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
