also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
