she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize