I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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