How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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